I shave your girlfriend bald.

My clippers.

This is the website for the business plan for my new business. The business is called I shave your girlfriend bald.

Executive summary

Helping your girlfriend pick which hair to have is hard. This will be the easiest decision you have made in your life.

Company description

I shave your girlfriend bald.

Definitions

I
Me, rex.
shave
With clippers.
your
Possessive form of "you," my customer.
girlfriend
Unmarried partner. Gender is irrelevant; the role is "girlfriend." Fiancées permitted case-by-case.
bald.
Absent of hair. A number zero. No options. No hairs left unshaven. Bald or bust.

Service line

Services include:

Some people have a girlfriend who wants to be bald. Some people who have a girlfriend want that girlfriend to be bald. I help with this.

Service lifecycle

  1. Your girlfriend has hair.
  2. I shave your girlfriend bald.
  3. Your girlfriend's hair grows.
  4. Your girlfriend is no longer bald.
  5. I shave your girlfriend bald again.

Pricing structure

I don't know how much people will pay for this but I don't think that matters.

Market analysis

This business caters to people with girlfriends who want to be bald or people who want their girlfriends to be bald. As this type of desire is not often voiced, that could be a lot of people.

Competitive analysis

I often get the question, "Why would I come to you to shave my girlfriend bald when I have clippers and could do it myself?"

If you were going to make a bald girlfriend yourself with your own girlfriend and your own clippers, you would do it. You are coming to me and my clippers with your girlfriend because you and your girlfriend want me to do it.

Company advantages

This is a unique product offering. Most haircut businesses have a wide menu of styles available. My business will offer one style: bald. It also caters to unique clientele (your girlfriend).

Shaving someone's girlfriend bald is an intimate experience not without a degree of danger. I have the clippers and your girlfriend. This adds an element to the experience of making your girlfriend bald.

People will enjoy my extrasalon, no-frills approach to hair. No questions. No complications. Just me and my clippers and your girlfriend who will be bald.

Organization

I shave your girlfriend bald is a limited liability company.

Marketing and sales

Word of mouth is all I will need to be successful. I am dedicated to my craft of shaving girlfriends bald with exquisite attention to detail. Once people see how good I am at shaving your girlfriend bald, they will want this for their girlfriends too.

Financial projections

People will always have girlfriends. Girlfriends can have hair. Some of those girlfriends with hair will want to be bald. There will always be a need for me.

Clippers cost about USD$35 and I already have some, so there is no startup cost. There may be maintenance expenses if I lose a guard or forget to oil my clippers for a long long time, but I won't.

My five-year outlook is good and my thirty-five-year outlook is better. I am healthy and mentally well and take care of my clippers. The market for bald girlfriends is stable and, in fact, probably growing, so there is nothing to worry about.

Conclusion

Let me do it.